butterfly effects

sometimes i wonder what would be if September 11 never happened. if i got my visa and took up NYU's scholarship instead. if i had not gone through form 6, this course and went to UK. if the last 6 years of my life was spent in new york.

would i be with the likes of oi yen, working in new york, a sophisticated cosmo girl ready to take on whatever life may throw at her? i would never have met the people who have enriched my life so much, sally, doreen, bansi, odil, raymond, alven, will... but who's to say that i won't meet others that will help me grow in different ways? who's that say that maybe, kalau ada jodoh, we would all meet one day, only in different circumstances?

there is a belief in karma that says that the people you meet today are people you are somehow destined to meet because of your relationship in your past life. that there are no chance encounters. perhaps its true. perhaps every encounter leaves you a different person, and lead to an aspect of yourself that you've not realised had you not met them.

so as far as karma goes, we are all put here for a reason. as a reaction for every decisions we make. and if we are to be so intricately linked, wouldn't one minor decision affect the lifes of others as well, those whom we've met, as well as those whom we've not met?

i don't know. i have no answers, only questions.

so back to here and now. perhaps i'm being optimistic by saying that there is some divine reason behind every mundane event. perhaps the lesson here is so that i'll be able to able to recognise and appreciate the better when it comes along.

perhaps the lesson is to make the ordinary, extraordinary.